“I love you”

When I was a kid I was a complete brat. I mean, I would start throwing tantrums at the drop of a hat saying, “nobody loves me”. But as I grew up I understood that the three words that everyone needs to hear doesn’t necessarily come out as an, ” I love you”. This beautiful three worded phrase can also be heard in sentences like:
Wear your seat belt.
Did you eat your food?
I made the bed for you.
Don’t be out too late.
I could write more about it, I could explain it a little more but I think all of us are mature enough to realise it and those of us aren’t mature enough to understand it, give yourself time to comprehend it. This phrase comes into our lives everyday, all we have to do is listen.
We also have to remember that we as people aren’t the only ones to express this phrase. We often forget that animals too express their sentiments. To all people with pets to add to their family know the joy of our four footed friends coming to greet us after a hard day’s work. That too is unprecedented love. The joy they have when they see us, when they charge furiously at the door just so they can greet us is the purest form of love.
We notice these everyday but it still goes unnoticed. If only we did we would probably start loving ourselves too.

Nivedita Kaipa

The “zombie” apocalypse.

We’ve all come across posts at least once on Facebook or 9Gag which portray words like,
“The thing to your right hand side will be your weapon for the zombie apocalypse “. All of us instinctively look and see random objects and have various thoughts like, ‘I am so going to nail this apocalypse’ or even things like, ‘Pft, like a boss!’
I am no one to judge because honestly I used to be one of those who got super excited at such posts but as I grew up I realised something. This was only because I started observing more and the more I noticed, the more I questioned and the more I questioned, the sadder I became because I failed to comprehend why people were so  psyched about the whole zombie apocalypse theory because we have failed to realise that this apocalypse is happening right in front of us and we still don’t notice. Maybe you’ve gotten it, maybe you haven’t. Either way, I’ll put it out there and say it. The very smart phones that we use, the very televisions that we’re glued to, the social media networks that keep us connected have turned us into zombies.
All of us are so busy with Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and YouTube that we fail to notice the real world. Before you get me wrong, I am one of those addicts, but I’ve learnt to curb my use of the social media and tried to get back into something more productive and fruitful like reading and writing. I’ve come to see these as something that slowly rots our brains and the net result that we always see are slow, dull people with no interest in the outer world, with nothing to challenge and stimulate their brains. The thought is  kind of scary because the very reason we are pumped up about this whole thing are turning into one of those things whose brains have degenerated and know nothing of the world. We no longer question and do what the crowd does, thereby becoming one of the brainless machines that do only as much as set to do. It’s also scary because we’ve lost our individuality that once used to set us apart. We’ve become so used to going with the flow that we forget that only dead fish go with the flow.
It’s really time we disconnect from all our gadgets, spend some quality family time, some nice alone time and dedicate a portion of this allocated to us for exploring the world around us and meeting new people. It’s time we stop clicking photos of food and snapchatting them when the only thing we should be doing with such delicious food is to be digging in and not telling the world what we’ve eaten and what we haven’t.
It’s never too late to reclaim our minds and reawaken our curiosity and re form bonds once so long forgotten.
If we fail to do so, then we will really turn into full fledged zombies with no minds of our own, acting on the whims of others and literally eating brains. It is really the need of the hour to take a self conscious decision to stop acting as though our brains have really putrefied and put an end to the “zombie apocalypse”.

Nivedita Kaipa

The silent killer

This is it. The last straw. You’ve snapped. However this is only on the inside. On the surface you look so stoic and poised. You’re ready to take on the world. But you don’t know how long you can keep up with the charade. You’ve kept this side hidden for so long that everything you do is in the autopilot mode. You’ve forgotten what it is to laugh and smile openly. However, all this and more is something only you notice. No one else sees it. You’ve decided that it’s time you end the game of charades. You’re determined. You’ve made up your mind.
You head home with a nylon rope, rat  poison and sleeping pills. You’ve seen this scene play out in your head so many times that you’re prepared. You’ve decided. It’s now or never. You meet your parents at home. They’re happy to see you back after a long day of work.  They’ve given you everything you’ve asked for. But the only thing that matters to you the most right now is giving up on everything. You’ve made up your mind.
You lock your room door under the pretext of wanting to change your clothes. You look towards your laptop. You erase the search history. Your attention goes towards the fan. You’re ready. You knot the nylon rope into a hoop. You’ve got the stool ready. Everything in place, you tighten the noose around your neck. You let go of the stool. Before you know it, you’re gone. You cease to exist.
Your soul emerges from your body, you’re wondering whether your folks would find out. Sure enough, mother comes and bangs the door. It doesn’t open. Father comes, knocks the door open only to see your lifeless body hung on to the ceiling fan.
What does the soul see? A weeping mother and a stunned father. Your soul catches the glimpse of your best friend. You two were supposed to have a study session. She’s shocked. She will forever be hating you for leaving her alone in the big bad world. Seeing all this, you long to get back into the young body you left so quickly. Your soul fights the urge. You float on. You see your baby sister sitting and weeping silently. You were her only source of strength.
The morning assembly announces your death. Reason: unknown. The class bully feels terrible. You witness all this and more but not in your physical state, more as a spiritual life force. You need to get back. But you can’t. You just can’t. You regret it. Or rather your soul does, which has been traveling since it can remember. It feels the urge to get back but you see it can’t. This is because the vessel is burnt. It has no home to return to now. The soul is forever tortured because it can’t find a forever home, it was comfortable with you, but you gave up too soon before it wanted to.
This post is purely because I want to spread awareness about mental health issues. Not many people acknowledge it openly. Many of us undergo bouts of depression but not all of us admit it. It is only when we recognise the problem can we solve it. It is only when we stop mocking people for their “weakness” can we address the elephant in the room which many of us fail to notice. Let’s all be stigma free and help such people when we begin to notice a difference in their behaviour and actions. Let’s all come together and save lives.

Nivedita Kaipa

10 things we all do that make us unhappy.

Recently I’ve noticed that I haven’t been keeping joyful for quite some time now. Then I decided to take a step back and see what I was doing that made me feel so sad.
Here is my list of what makes us unhappy most of the times.
1) Talking to “that” friend: let’s face it, we all have that one person whom we consider or considered as a friend but when you get off the phone or finish speaking with the person, you feel drained and you wonder why, (in case you don’t have one such friend, maybe you’re the friend 😛). We all have gossip mongers amongst us too. So, what do you do? DISMISS such people from your life. Put people who make you feel alive on the front bench. I’ve done it and it feels awesome! It’s worth the effort!!
2) A blast from the past: I’ve been guilty quite a few times for this. But the one thing I sure know is that the past may be a nice place but nothing beautiful grows there. Whenever you see your past, acknowledge it but do not open the door for it.
3) Social media: Facebook, Twitter and Instagram are flooded with with posts and pictures of people travelling, people getting married, some even having kids. This makes you feel like you’re not doing anything worthy. But I feel that maybe if we disconnect, even if it’s for a bit and view our achievements it’ll be so much better.
4) Seeing what we DON’T have: Why don’t we see how truly wonderful we are? There’s no harm in knowing or even perceiving ourselves as the awesome-est people ever. (Warning: too much could lead to narcissistic  tendencies, so let’s tone it down a notch whenever we have to)
5) Not talking about how we truly feel:  I cannot lay enough emphasis on this. I am one of those who don’t express enough. End result is that I always end up getting frustrated. It’s not healthy to keep so many things inside of you. Let’s learn to open up without the fear of being ridiculed or judged.
6) Not smiling enough: Ah well!! Let’s brighten the world with our smiles shall we? You’ll feel better and so will the other person seeing you. Let’s all smile more. However doing this is in all situations will lead to people thinking you’re cuckoo. So use your head and smile.
7) We all need to learn to acknowledge when we feel the need to break down: We’ve been through this road before. But the way I look at it, it feels as though we’re ashamed in just admitting the fact that we feel the need to break open the dam. But it’s okay. It really is. I can tell you for fact that I cry whenever I feel the need. The world does look better after that. You feel better and your stress and tension reduce. And it’s never unmanly to cry.
8) Not enough hugs: This part is personally my favourite. I love hugging. And I also love receiving hugs. Hugs do make you feel better and they’re a lifesaver. So let’s hug people we love or are close to more. It makes us all feel special. So why not?
9) Not connecting with one another face to face: With the advent of social media and smartphones, we no longer feel the need to talk to people face to face. Imagine the amount of disrespect we give people when we answer a call or respond to a text when we’re talking to them or are even engaged in an animated conversation. Let us forget about our phones when we’re in our intimate friend circle and catch up on life. This one should be done offline and not online.
10) Routine, routine and more routine: We are so used to routine in our lives that we’ve forgotten how to live. Most of the times we don’t realise that it’s our routine that gets to us. I know a friend who loves breaking his routine time and again only cause it makes him feel better. Routine starts getting to you. Maybe it’s time for us to break our habits and come out of this shell because life truly begins outside of your comfort zone.

All said and done, let’s all try to not be the reason for our unhappiness. Let’s all choose to be happy now. I’ve come to realise that life is too short to be anything but happy.

 

Miracles do exist.

The dictionary defines a miracle as a wonder or a marvel. It also says that it is the effect or event manifesting as a work of God. Have you ever stopped and wondered or ever asked Him to show you a miracle? Miracles take place everyday and everywhere. We just have to learn to see them in everyday things.
What would you count as a miracle? Make a list and see what you are would consider a miracle. Do YOU feature anywhere on that list of yours? If you  don’t, you better hurry and add yourself to the checklist of yours. Surprised? You are the biggest miracle for your parents and for people who love you and adore you.
The very fact that you live to see the next day, to wake up to your alarm clock, to see the sun shine and hear the birds chirp is a miracle. If you don’t think this is a miracle, then I don’t know what is. Your family is the next best miracle that could happen to you. Ask someone who isn’t fortunate enough. For them, a caring family is a miracle.
The very fact that you can afford food, clothing and shelter is a miracle. As a person who can’t afford any of these. For them getting a rupee in their bowls is an act of God.
For a mother who has endured long hours of labour her newborn child is a miracle. Ask a mother who has given birth to a still born. Ask her what she would do to experience the joys of motherhood.
Ask people who have had close calls with death. Living and breathing after such a close call is a miracle, not only for them but also for people who are a part of their lives. Just seeing them live and laugh is a blessing in disguise. Ask people who’ve lost their closest of friends and family members and they will tell you what a wonder it was having them around.
There are people who’ve struggled with cancer and beaten the odds just to prove their doctors wrong. Their defeating the disease and living to tell the tale is again a miracle. An act of God.
For people battling the life threatening disease of AIDS, seeing the sunrise and the sunset, listening to their favourite music, doing things they love. Everyday that passes without them giving up on life and moving on is the biggest miracle of all times.
So don’t you ever think that miracles don’t exist. They happen. They happen all the time. We’re just so caught up with our smartphones and tabs that we fail to open our eyes and more importantly our hearts to witness such beautiful happenings around us.
In closing I would like to say that even after reading this you don’t believe in miracles then you my friend should take a minute and hold a mirror to your face and stare hard and stare good. You will see the miracle smile back at you.

Nivedita Kaipa